It’s expensive to be RIGHT!

Over the years I have seen a decided increase in the unwillingness of divorce litigants to compromise.  They often view the case from the myopic vantage point of their own perspective, ignoring the possibility that their spouse may have a different perspective.  Not even a recognition that the spouse may have a different perspective, let alone an assessment of whether there is any logical basis for it. “But I’m right.  He did this to me.  She did that to me. Why should I give in, or compromise, or… fill [...]

By |2019-11-22T15:40:20+00:00October 22nd, 2019|Uncategorized|Comments Off on It’s expensive to be RIGHT!

Parental Alienation

Parental alienation comes in all forms – from the most extreme cases of overt brainwashing, parental abduction and even false allegations of sexual abuse to more subtle forms that might not even be perceptible to the perpetrator.  It is, however, in all its forms, child abuse. Our children are born to two parents.  Under New Jersey law there is a presumption that children are entitled to the love, affection, and guidance of both parents.  Of course, if circumstances suggest that that is not in a child’s best interests, court [...]

By |2019-11-22T15:42:59+00:00September 19th, 2019|Divorce, Lawyer's Advice|Comments Off on Parental Alienation

Back to School – Now What?

Next month the children will return to school after a long, hot summer.  Camps, vacations, and just having the children home all the time is enough for any parent to worry about.  Having the children around all day, all summer, no matter their age, is time consuming and requires your full attention. But what happens when they go back to school?  You have more time to focus on the state of your marriage.  Is it worth saving?  Does she want to save it?  Does he want to save it?  [...]

By |2019-11-22T15:44:37+00:00August 22nd, 2019|Publications for Divorce Professionals|Comments Off on Back to School – Now What?


What happens when the higher earning spouse is suddenly laid off or becomes the victim of a corporate merger or is otherwise terminated for reasons beyond his or her control?  A family, which based its lifestyle on a certain level of income, can suddenly be thrust into turmoil. Mortgage and car payments, manageable before the job loss can become daunting obligations.  What about the child who is halfway through college at an expensive university?  Medical insurance, tutoring for a struggling high school student, or even basic necessities, in some [...]

By |2019-11-22T15:35:06+00:00July 19th, 2019|Lawyer's Advice|Comments Off on Crisis

Beyond The Brand

EACH MONTH, CM features Divorce Talk by Peter C. Paras, a shareholder in the Paras, Apy & Reiss (PAR) law firm. This April, PAR is celebrating its 23rd anniversary of practice in Red Bank. The founding partners, Peter C. Paras, Patricia (Tricia) E. Apy, and Bonnie M.S. Reiss left successful practices in large law firms in 1996 to create a boutique law firm dedicated solely to the practice of divorce and family law. All three partners recognized that clients in divorce cases experience strong emotions and upheaval and consequently [...]

By |2019-11-22T15:25:05+00:00April 19th, 2019|The Firm|Comments Off on Beyond The Brand

2019 NJ Super Lawyers

Congratulations to our attorneys! Patricia E. Apy, Esq. - Super Lawyer Peter C. Paras, Esq. - Super Lawyer Elissa A. Perkins, Esq. - Super Lawyer (Rising Star) Bonnie M. S. Reiss, Esq. - Super Lawyer

By |2019-03-15T14:52:20+00:00March 15th, 2019|Uncategorized|Comments Off on 2019 NJ Super Lawyers

Hollywood vs. New Jersey: Finalizing Your Divorce

In the movie “Sweet Home Alabama,” the character played by Reese Witherspoon travels from New York to Alabama in an attempt to have her estranged husband sign off on their divorce papers shortly before her scheduled wedding to another man.  Ultimately, while the estranged husband signs the papers, Ms. Witherspoon’s Melanie does not, and her lawyer is forced to run down the aisle at Melanie’s wedding, waving the papers, yelling for Melanie to sign and finalize her divorce before she says her “I do’s.”    While we won’t spoil the [...]

By |2018-09-25T14:54:47+00:00September 24th, 2018|Uncategorized|Comments Off on Hollywood vs. New Jersey: Finalizing Your Divorce

Where’s my Financial Aid? College Expenses and New Jersey Law

Will I have to pay for my children’s college expenses?  Will my former spouse have an obligation to pay?  What if neither of us can afford to send our child to college? These questions are commonplace in nearly every divorce matter involving children, and for that reason, it is important for divorcing couples to have an understanding of the basic law underlying college contribution in New Jersey.  This is the first in a series of articles aimed at addressing this law. Often times, especially in those cases where a [...]

By |2018-06-14T19:56:43+00:00June 14th, 2018|Uncategorized|Comments Off on Where’s my Financial Aid? College Expenses and New Jersey Law


“Can I keep the house?” The answer varies from case to case. This seemingly simple question is actually a multifaceted one fraught with complicated facts- and emotions. Years ago a man literally divided the house in half by using a chainsaw to cut through the roof and the walls. That triumph of emotion over intellect is not the preferred way of answering the question. Generally, there are two main areas with many sub-parts to explore. First, does the income and asset picture allow you to buy your spouse’s interest? Second, assuming you can buy out your spouse, can you [...]

By |2018-06-01T15:34:40+00:00June 1st, 2018|Divorce, Property|Comments Off on Housekeeping

Mandatory Court Conferences in Divorce Matters

It is quite possible that the only time you’ve ever stepped foot in a courthouse is for jury duty.  During the course of your divorce, however, you may have to appear in court several times before the hearing at which your divorce is finalized.    The below serves as a short primer on what you can expect during these appearances. Case Management Conference: This is a court conference scheduled soon after the parties have filed their divorce pleadings.  In many (although not all) cases, this will be the first time [...]

By |2018-04-20T15:18:36+00:00April 20th, 2018|Divorce, Divorce Tips, Family Court, Mediation And Arbitration|Comments Off on Mandatory Court Conferences in Divorce Matters
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